I phoned my surgery up this morning and asked the receptionist if she could arrange a home visit by the doctor and, if possible, could I have Dr Slack.
She replied: “I’m afriad not, Dr Slack has gone to a conference in town with Dr Black and I’ve no idea when they will all be back.
“Dr Grey is away for the day, Dr Blue has been struck down with the flu and hasn’t a clue what to do.
“Dr Watson has gone on holiday to Whitley Bay and won’t be home until the last week in May.
“But if you could ring again at half past two I may be able to get you an appointment with Dr Who, or failing that, you could ring again tomorrow, say about 10 o clock and I’ll arrange for you a visit by Dr Spock.
“Oh fine,” I said, “That will do nicely, thanks old cock.”